The Greatest Words You Can Give Yourself
Purple background with yellow light burst containing a word cloud.
All right friends, I’m sharing my last bit of mindset/communication wisdom of 2024.
We know that out of adversity, comes growth, that there is little success without at least some struggle, but MY GOD, 2024…
The punches have rained down like, well, rain.
And so, I’d like to leave you with a phrase that I have come to rely on that immediately shifts my perspective and allows me the space to breathe and pick up my mentally and emotionally battered self from the floor of failure, sadness and disappointment.
It is, “SO WHAT.”
Full stop.
Complete sentence.
“SO WHAT” encapsulates and reflects the things that I can’t change, that I have zero control over. Up until very recently, I’ve been a worrier. I’m the kind of person who comes awake at 2am concerned about whether my young adult daughter is taking care of herself, or why one person out of 100 didn’t rave about my last presentation, or if the gifts that I so carefully chose, wrapped, and shipped will reach their destination whole and intact. All things that are completely out of my reach.
Now, I’m a semi-reformed worrier, on a journey to becoming proverbial duck’s back. Because worrying about the possibility of a thing actually has zero effect on the thing. Worrying is wasted emotion and energy. And, according to studies, people who worry are at risk of dying sooner than other people. Yeah, no thanks.
Adopting “SO WHAT” is liberating. Of course, I want to put forth my best effort with a hopeful heart, in every endeavor, relationship and experience, AND once I do, it’s completely out of my hands. The thing no longer belongs to me, and so whatever someone else does, or thinks or however they might react, is entirely theirs to own.
My close-personal-friend-who-I-have-never-met, Mel Robbins, recently released a book entitled “The Let Them Theory,” which is her take on another facet of “SO WHAT.” I’m not saying that she and I are psychically linked, but I’m not not saying it either. I’m excited to dig into another woman’s perspective on these ideas.
As we move toward 2025, I’ve pledged to myself to more robustly and holistically adopt “SO WHAT” across the scope of my life. Even the thought of it lets me exhale a little deeper and drop my shoulders the smallest bit more.
A “SO WHAT” mindset is a growth mindset. By actively letting go of worry, the weight of other people’s opinions, and the universe-sized container of things I can’t control, I can actually turn my attention to the things I can build, make, influence, and create.
To that I say “SO WHAT NOW…”
LB Adams is the CEO of Practical Dramatics, LLC. She is a communication & public speaking coach, author and keynote speaker.